Not loneliness but the feeling of aloneness
Sometimes I truly feel like alone in life. Is as if I am the only one here on this planet who is having such an experience or feels the way I do or will feel this way.
Pretty egoic er egotistical but it is where I can be at times. Also, probably need to get out more. Chuckle, chuckle..
And at times I have felt that I must be the most sensitive creature on this planet. Forget the unicellular organisms and the other harmful algal blooms and see sensitivity defined, me. Hah! Recently I have found by reading other blogs, engaging in conversation on twitter and in the usual places, that I am not so different than other living beings.
Phew! That was a close call.
Yay more Nonviolent Communication (NVC): What I love about NVC it is really about being compassionate to yourself, yes, to you. Who else, right?
It is so exciting and yet comforting to see other people working on similar processes.
While multi-tasking, I stumbled upon a wonderful sharing of an experience surrounding NVC called Nonviolence and me, on the blog to the drawing board, A Changling blog. Besides describing NVC in seriously understandable terms, what is shared is her process of noticing, and then being compassionate to herself and gently engaging in self non-violent conversation and activity. This is so helpful for me, because I am a novice in NVC. While being a beginner, I am also aware of how much value lies in developing this communication skill.
I hope you will read the full post, here it is again at to the drawing board, A Changling blog .
So here’s a line from her NVC work, “So I asked myself, what is it that I need right now?”
Now, have you ever asked yourself that and in what context? Maybe you have, but before I started doing this work, this was a rarity for me to engage in such healthy gentle, and productive self talk. If you have been doing it all along or most of the time or even once, it’s incredible for you! So very happy for you!
Overall this resonated a bunch with me, as I have been reading and making an effort to work NVC in my relationships. I can relate to this self-talk now more than ever. Because I have these moments and it takes an effort for me to be gentle and caring towards myself.
Often, I focus on someone else experiences, thoughts or feelings instead of me. I try to understand why they are treating me the way they are, what is going on for them, how they feel,…eventually I would end up at I’m angry with them and they are not here for me….
But by noticing what I experience and then moving on to feeling what I feel and defining my need, I cut out all of the blame, anger, and other stuff that get in the way and get my attention. This allows me to take care of myself and not get caught up in all that unnecessary junk…stuff that really takes me from my goals and from meeting my needs.
Self care is so challenging, however, the rewards we reap are amazing…simply incredible.
Oh, since I started this piece I have had further experiences with NCV. Looking forward to sharing with you in the near future.
Until then, be well and good to you.